Husband (after watching Tom Brady break into tears talking about almost not getting drafted): Do you think Tom Brady could be our baby’s godfather?
Me: Um…
Husband: I mean, I wouldn’t be asking in a weird, serial killer stalker kind of way. I could write him a nice letter. Do you think he’d say yes?
Me: I’m sure he’d say yes to being the godparent of a total stranger’s child. That’s not weird at all.
Husband: Stranger?! I’ve known him intimately for the past 10 seasons!
Me: Right. So what religion would we be baptizing this child into?
Husband (thinking for a minute): Patriotism.
Me: Patriotism?
Husband: Yes, Patriotism. And Giselle would have to be the godmother.
Me: Of course.