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Oscar couch commentary.

Here’s a representative snippet of the running commentary from our couch last night as we watched the Oscars red carpet: Me: “Holy Nick Nolte!” Husband: “Whoa. Is he drunk?” Me: “Probably.” Me: “Oh Penelope, that hairdo is no bueno.” Husband: “I bet that guy freebased cocaine on the way in.” Me: “Um, that’s Jason Segel. From…

I always wanted to wear a uniform.

Whoa. Guess I needed a few weeks to recover from the 9 year old birthday party. But I’m back! And I’m ready to share with you what I wear pretty much every day. It is what I have started calling the Mom Uniform. I did not know it was the mom uniform until Husband, after a…

Weekend getaway.

It was my niece Anna’s birthday on Saturday. She turned nine years old. To celebrate, she wanted nothing more in this world than to spend the night with all her friends at Great Wolf Lodge, an indoor water park in Williamsburg, Virginia. So my sister rented a van, invited 6 other 9 year olds along…

Go ahead, stand in line at Georgetown Cupcake.

Please. And send all of your visiting friends and family there, too. Maybe they’ll get on TV or something while they’re waiting for tiny, fancy-pants cupcakes served by perky Georgetown undergrads. Me? I’ll be down the street having a real cupcake at Baked and Wired. A huge honking cupcake wrapped in a rustic parchment paper…

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhklahoma!

Right after Christmas we packed up the babe and flew to Lawton, Oklahoma. What’s that you say? You’ve never heard of Lawton? Never been to Oklahoma? Well, me neither. And before my visit, my knowledge of that midwestern state was pretty much limited to a hazy notion of dust bowls and the Trail of Tears. Not…

Americanization.

 It’s official: the baby human hitherto known here as “le bébé” shall now be referred to as “the babe.” Why? Well, I need to slowly let go of Paris. I’m not going back. I’m not French. And I’ll be damned if I go all Madonna and adopt a foreign accent when we all know I’m…

I’m alive.

Just not finding much time to write, what with the moving and the baby and the steady rush of family and friends to catch up with. But now that my internet connection is secured, I promise to set up a work station and get back to sharing all the funny crazy stuff that makes up…

I’m not in Paris anymore…

Just to give you an idea of just how much reverse culture shock I’m in for over the next couple weeks, let me  describe my morning: I woke up with le bébé and instead of feeding her under 12 foot moulded ceilings in front of a marble fire place, I fed her while sitting in…

Home.

Well, that was crazy. In one of the biggest surprises in the history of Paris, the cable company actually disconnected my phone and internet service early. Which is a bummer for many reasons, but mostly because I had to spend a good 2 days holed up in the bathroom with le bébé as the movers packed…

One week left.

How many pain au raisins do you think I can eat between now and then? How many sips of champagne can I squeeze in? Will I be able to find some closure watching my last episodes of Doctors? I don’t know the answers to these important questions. But I do know that I’ve spent the…